This past week I have been enjoying the luxury of life in Canada and North America sitting around playing on my computer reading and studying, working at an easy stress free job, going to bed late and waking up late in the morning. I have hot water and plenty of food a room to my self and the ability to drive where ever and whenever I want. But there is a nagging feeling in me telling me to start getting out of my comfort zone and talk to people.
I am a shy person and would rather be invited to do something with people or invite people over. I want to be intrusive and invite myself into peoples lives, but then my North American up bringing stops me and reminds me that people don't want to be bothered they are just as busy as me. But know I look at what I have been doing and really I am just sitting around reading learning and attempting to write a paper (this is my procratacation writing this) I have become lazy and content with my self but know I am become frustrated with my lack of contribution to the life I am living in.
But then I think about all I want to do and become over whelmed with all I could do. I know I should spend more time in prayer focusing on others needs rather then my own. I know I should get out of the house and hang out with the youth and staff that I decide to stay here for. I wish I could finish this paper and then take the initiative to get out and learn first hand what people are going through. Yet here I sit taking up space that could be used by so many others. I think about the disasters that are happening in Asia and think about helping them but then turning around and eat some more food while I watch the news of people starving and aid not being able to get to those that need it.
The question then enters my mind "where do I go from here?" I ask God to make me move but first I must pull up my anchor of pride and rise the sails so that God can send his spirit to move me.
just like in this picture I hope that in the next few weeks I can pull away from the harbour and begin to weather the seas of life. Where I go from here I have no idea but hopefully I can find my way. 
1 comment:
Bro, I hear ya. Finding that balance between doing what you need to do, and getting out there and helping others is tough. I hope you can really take advantage of the opportunities God gives you with people. I know for me it's tough to "intrude" as well. So here I sit, playing video games, and getting frustrated with myself.
Anyway Love you to bits. Keep truckin.
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